How a Server's Small Gesture Made Me a Customer for Life

Dear Pros,

It's Food & Wine's senior editorial director Sean Flynn here. I just got back from a quick trip to Ireland, and in between drinking plenty of Guinness and eating as many oysters as humanly possible, I was reminded of what it's like to experience truly welcoming hospitality. It's been a little over a year since I've been to Dublin, but I visited one of my favorite hotel restaurants, The Saddle Room at The Shelbourne Hotel. My friend and I had a great dinner, a few cocktails, and plenty of laughs. When it came time for dessert, the server asked if I'd be interested in having their bread pudding since I liked it so much the last time I was there. I was curious how they remembered, and they said they'd overheard me mentioning how much I'd enjoyed it.

It wasn't a grand gesture, but a simple touch that made me feel so welcomed. Gestures like that don't cost the restaurant any additional money, but pay off in heaps. Everyone likes to go to a place where they're remembered (cue the Cheers theme song).

In just over a month, I'll be heading to New Orleans to speak at Tales of the Cocktail about the art of hospitality. The conference, which runs from July 20 to 25, includes dozens of seminars, tastings, and talks, and is regarded as the largest and most influential spirits industry event in the world. This part of the hospitality sector has seen major changes in the past few years with people opting for less or no alcohol, but still posessing an appetite to go out to bars.

So how do they make non-imbibing folks feel welcome in a place that's traditionally been geared towards drinking? Increasingly, nonalcoholic drinks are no longer an afterthought, but rather a signature aspect of the menu. But beyond that, there are so many ways to make people feel invited — from the array of beverages, to the spoken and unspoken language that bartenders and servers use, to the physical design of the room. I always think about how Frank Lloyd Wright intentionally lowered the ceilings in seating areas to subconsciously encourage people to take a seat and stay a while.

If you find yourself at Tales of the Cocktail, I invite you to come say hi. And the next time you're out raising a glass, I encourage you to pay attention to the subtle things the staff does to make you feel at home. It's a great way to get ideas for how to make others feel more comfortable at your bar or restaurant.

Cheers,
Sean